A New Spin...

Hahaha - whooda thunk it...

After all that contemplation and renunciation last year, here's a new spin (one that makes you go "duh") on the old hair/India/lice issue...

I'd convinced myself that it was some great letting-go, that it was foolish to fight shaving my head, that it was a great lesson in how attached I'd become to my glamorous, goddess self...

So a friend says the other day, "my perspective is that it seems like you were giving away your power, going off and chasing a man to India - and catching lice in the very place you were looking for him.

Right.

So all this "great time of renunciation" thing? Fuck that! (although it's surely been very good for my inner strength) - it was simply the foolish consequence of chasing love where it was unrequited. And then lingering too long after I'd discovered that...

And yet, surely the beauty of renunciation has been deep. Surrendering ever into God's hands, God's plan... But now I see that I can surrender also to the power and grace that flows thru me - This is God, flowing through my hair, through the beauty of my dance, through the riversong of my voice. So I surrender to beauty, to sensual love, to this sweet and sacred earth, to friendships that nourish like dew on my sexy skin.

And I renounce loneliness, timidity, holding-back, heck, even renunciation itself!

And I've learned this: when we give away our power and grace to that which doesn't support us, even more than we know can be lost or taken away. But this only empties us to fill up again - we do emerge stronger. The rage that comes clawing out of our hearts, raising our cry to dear God - "I am Worthy!" - this is a sacred rage, the power of Shakti showering us with her cleansing rain...